The Secret to Perfect Family Photos
What are the most important factors when preparing for family photos? Is it what you wear? Location and time of day? Bribing the kids with toys and sugar? These things are all important (in fact I write about each of them here), but they aren’t the most important things. Some of my favorite images of my family involve times that I let the kids talk me into outfits that they loved but weren’t my favorite. We’ve made beautiful images in less than ideal light, in locations that weren’t the easiest, and on days when the kids just weren’t feeling it.
But you know what is the one thing that will make a huge difference in your photos? It’s you being you.
I know that sounds simple, but go with me here: The best family sessions are going to be different for every family, because every family is different. My goal for every singe session is that when you see your images for the first time, you say, “Wow, that picture is so us!” I want you to be able to look at your photos and feel the relationships and connections you have as a family. I want to capture milestones–big ones like nursing your baby for a whole year or your youngest child losing teeth–and small ones, like the cartwheel your son has been trying to perfect for months. I’d love for these images to be a lasting reminder of who you were in this moment.
But, practically, how do I do that? I have some tried and true tips to make this magic happen:
1. Give your photographer ALL the info. I work best when I know a lot about your family! I love it when people give me a synopsis of who everyone is, things they like and don’t like, and things that will make me look cool to your kids. For example, if I were going to tell a photographer something about my kids, I would say that my daughter (age 7) HATES all things competitive. She will flat out refuse an activity if there is going to be a winner or a loser. So if you say, “You and your brother should race and see who’s fastest!” you won’t get happy smiles. You might end up with a meltdown.
2. Remember why you like each other. This may sound a little corny, but it works! On the way to your photoshoot, think and talk about things you love about each other. “What’s your favorite thing about daddy?” “What’s the silliest thing we’ve ever done as a family?”
3. Consider everything your kids do as the cutest thing ever. Look, kids have a way of acting out at photoshoots. They might be shy (even if they’ve never been shy before) or they might be really hyper and yell “poop!” constantly. I’ve seen the whole spectrum of strange kid behavior (even from my kids, who know me really well!). Sometimes I think we inadvertently put pressure on the kids because we feel a lot of pressure. We tell them to “hurry,” and “listen,” and “stop making that weird face.” (seriously, kids make the strangest faces when there’s a camera involved!) But this can just increase the anxiety the kids feel, and it will make the parents look tense in the photos. The best advice I have is to interact with your kids in the moment, and laugh at the silliness. Say things like, “You keep yelling poop! Now lets try yelling ‘pee!’” (Look, I know that we’re all tired of the potty words–but saying “pee” turns the mouth up into a smile, which makes a great picture.) Whatever the kids are doing might be super annoying, but if you pretend that you find it adorable and hilarious, it can diffuse the situation and give us some great photos.
4. Don’t be someone you’re not, even if it looks great on Pinterest. I know it’s really tempting to wear the latest fad or have similar photos that you see on social media even if it’s not “you.” I’d like to encourage you not to do this. If you typically wear dresses, don’t choose jeans for your photoshoot. If your kids are used to comfortable play clothes, now is probably not time to try out formalwear. I speak from experience–my kid loves comfort and I put her in a stiff dress and itchy tights for a photoshoot. I knew better, and it did not elicit the most natural expressions from her.
One final note, as it relates to kids: I am NOT judging you or your kids. So often I hear moms say, “You must think we have no rules at our house!” Or, “I swear, he’s never like this!” I’m really not thinking any of that. I am a mom and I know what it’s like. I know you’re nervous about pictures. I know that kids are unpredictable. I legitimately love meeting new families and kids and seeing the people that I’ve photographed before. It doesn’t phase me at all if your kids aren’t listening to me. It’s a whole different story when I’m on the other side of the camera as a mom, but when I’m in photographer mode, I’m enjoying your family and trying to make great images that show who you are. And who you are is beautiful. I promise.